Day 5 - A Year of Spiritual Awakening - Time is not Linear

Lesson 5: Time is not linear...

I am running behind on this lesson, 1 because I got busy and didn't have enough time (which is funny when you read what's to come) and 2 because it requires full attention.

Carrying on from the last lesson, the concept of time makes another appearance, except it's much heavier than the last post. It's one massive journey and a lot to take on if you don't believe in past lives and future self. I do however believe in this. I have done past life regression, seen past lives and also a future life. For anyone that hasn't done this before, it may be a massive leap to action the following:

Lesson Five: Time is not linear. It is energy, and energy does not work in linear progression. Because time is not linear, as you may have once believed, it is easy for you to jump levels in time: to visit this lifetime in the past, that event in the future. It is easy to jump levels in time, once you understand the connection of all time.

Exercise: Take a moment, and ask yourself who you still hold karma with, in this lifetime. Close your eyes, and ask for a glimpse of the last lifetime you held. Close your eyes, and ask for a glimpse of the next lifetime you will have.

In one of my past life regressions, I saw my very last life before this one. There is karma from that which has flowed into this life. I do not have a good relationship with my father. Growing up, I don't think he knew how to be a father, and I guess no one really does until you become a parent. My problem as I reflect back is that he didn't try. He used to put me down and I'm not sure of the extent of this on my older brother. My dad didn't make feel good enough, that everything I did was failure. I was a kid. Kids tend to make mistakes. Kids tend to do silly things but we seek guidance from our parents to become better people. I had no confidence, low self esteem and felt worthless a lot of the time. I felt ugly. At times, I didn't think I wanted to live or didn't see the point in living. That's tough when you're a teenager. I didn't really show this towards my friends because of course you want to fit in. I remember at one point, I didn't like my life that I wanted to move to Singapore and live with extended family, just because I thought I might feel better. I currently don't talk to my dad and once I figure out who I am as a person, I believe the day will come when this will be part of the past that I built myself from.

So in my previous life regression, I saw myself living in country America on a farm. I remember seeing the corn fields and white porch of the farmhouse. I was a young caucasian boy, with blond hair and was named Jack. I was very much a loner with one real friend - my dog named Sammy. I remember my mother. She was a beauty. She had bright red hair and a wonderful smile that made me happy and reassured. My father's face I couldn't see, as in, his face was deliberately faded out. He abused me in this lifetime- physically and mentally. What I did see was myself grow up to be a fine man, got out of rural America and made something of myself. I believed this was the 1950s, and the timeline seems short as I'm born in 1984, so either I had a really short previous life or I have the dates wrong completely. All I know is that this life was definitely the life before now.

So, I asked the Divine to connect with me on this meditation to see my future life. I always put on relaxing music and randomly selected "Learn to Forgive", which is a testament to my current life and what I need to work on. I thought it was hilarious. Anyway, I was getting a lot of images. I saw myself as a gay man with my lover. I seemed happy but it seemed like I had a heavy burden to wear. Then, I mostly saw myself as a man living in Japan but not as a Japanese person. I believe I was caucasian and working on some projects together with a Japanese firm. Couldn't see what job I had. Then I saw random images like a lady who I knew was my mum but not related to that man living in Japan. I saw an Englishman who was my father, also not related to the man living in Japan. I feel like it was very fragmented but nonetheless, I have future lives ahead of me. Whether I connect spiritually in those lifetimes, I'm not sure. What I take from this is that, maybe as a gay man, I may have another lifetime of daddy issue karma but I feel like it might transform into a non-acceptance of who I am. The man living in Japan looked like he was just happy living his life, so maybe that's something to look forward to?

I can definitely see things lingering from one life to another, though I also see the potential of overcoming karma in the next life. It all seems like a working progress towards self. It makes me wonder however we start off, does our lives end when we ultimately learn all our lessons in life? Such a massive question to ponder on and answer.